I mean I am actually falling more in love. I am actually discovering this whole world of feelings that somehow is kept secret from everyone. Somehow a mother/child relationship has been reduced to that of a walking planner and a walking nightmare. It is so far from that. It is so holy. So sacred. So mind blowingly heart opening. And this is what I have been searching for my entire life. Unconditional love. I am so blessed to wake up everyday to him.
It isn’t even that I want to see who he will become but rather…every single moment of his existence is a freeze frame of wild love- learning, growing, morphing and igniting but bright and glowing at every moment. A thousand colors and a thousand bulbs erupting in space…somehow leaving photographs dotted across the stars. He is a infinity and I am an infinity running parallel to his stream – lucky enough to see the afterglow of his supernova exploding and changing every minute. We are all moving so fast, so slow, so heartbreakingly beautifully.
This is life, this is love, this is reality. And some days I can almost feel the pinkish, white glow that seems to be accumulating in the atmosphere around us. Sitting in the slats of golden light that fly through the windows at us. I can almost feel that eternity holding us close into something that might be tangible. Something that might last forever. Laughter, love and light. Those things keep ringing. We just glow and change and watch pictures fly away from us in a speeding car reality. Love is everything. Love is keeping us real.