FUCK. I’m miserable. Or at least thats how I woke up. I finally got to sleep in and I couldn’t even enjoy it because I would continue to go on NO sleep if it meant I got to wake up in Australia. I always always thought it would be so wonderful to come home but instead it is weird. I feel out of place. I feel like I belong no where. I’m depressed by the person I was when I left and the person I feel like I’ll soon fall back into. I’m losing my magic and my soul and nothing feels like home. It all feels foreign. And at first that was exciting…but now that that’s worn off I’m just sitting in a house in a land of 4-lane highways and no magic.
What the fuck is about being home that makes me just so lifeless?
I can’t even write about it because I don’t even know what it is. Everything is escaping me. Every bit of beautiful magic that I had flowing through my fingertips. I know that I’m still that person…but I can’t feel it. I can’t feel anything today.