Today is my last day of being a teenager. And it was magical and rich and full of life. It was everything. It was all over the place…full of a thousand different emotions, thoughts, and breathtaking moments. It was perfect.

It’s an overwhelming place and thought. Where I am…where I’ll be…where I’ve been. How far I’ve come…how young I am. What it means to be a teenager. A thousand memories and feelings wash over me and still I don’t know if I’ll ever really know what it means to be nineteen. To be a teenager.

Twenty is large. But that’s tomorrow. Today is youth. Rebellion. Acne. But I don’t really feel like I’ve been a teenager for a long time. Age is confounding to me and I feel all at once everything.

I’ll never be ready for it. I’ll never know when it happens…all I can do is breathe it in and out and cherish everything I have about the past, present and future. And love it. Love myself. And love letting it go.

It’s the end of a decade. It’s the end of my teenage years. 

But mostly…it’s a huge beginning. A celebration of birth, rebirth and life. Holding on, letting go, and being reborn all at the same time. 

It’s a thousand things…it’s a beautiful moment in time…but most of all…it’s a celebration.

To life. To living. To growing. Up and out and older…but always eternally young. I will always be here and I will never know it. 

To angst and lost love and hope and bliss and pain and immaturity and maturity and changing and learning and being up against the wall and free inside of the most marvelous world. To today, tomorrow and yesterday. Beyond age, beyond words…to being alive. 

TO NOW.

Always.

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